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Citizen Infrastructure

Relational tech

Most of the technology in our lives is built to capture our attention, optimise our behaviour, or sell us things. Relational tech asks what technology would look like if its purpose were the opposite: to help the people in a place care for each other, collaborate, and build trust.

The term comes from the Relational Technology Project (RTP), founded in 2025 by Deborah Tien, Josh Nesbit, and Sadev Parikh. They describe relational tech as “village-scale tools that strengthen relationships in neighbourhoods” — and, crucially, tools that are co-created in a way that itself deepens relationships.

”Building with,” not “building for”

Section titled “”Building with,” not “building for””

The core shift is from being a consumer of technology to being a producer of it. In the dominant model, “we wait in our homes for other people to build stuff for us” — handed finished platforms we have no say in. Relational tech instead brings neighbours together to build what they need, with the building itself becoming an occasion for connection. (Deborah Tien traces the idea to years in Arusha, Tanzania, helping people build their own tools — a bicycle-powered maize sheller, a wind-powered washing machine — where she noticed the technology was often “just an excuse for people to talk to each other.”)

Habits of the heart

Section titled “Habits of the heart”

RTP frames the practice as a set of “habits of the relational tech heart” (a nod to de Tocqueville):

  • start with relationships and real local needs, not a grand platform;
  • learn from the people around you — elders, kids, neighbours who speak other languages or hold different values, and “neighbours who aren’t human”;
  • don’t aim for perfection — aim for enough relevance to receive the gift of feedback;
  • measure success by how much trust and care is renewed, not by users or growth;
  • “conflict means someone cares”;
  • assume the tool will change, so design for shared stewardship.

Good friction

Section titled “Good friction”

Mainstream products chase frictionless convenience. Relational tech deliberately keeps some “good friction,” because — as RTP puts it — the messiness is where the energy, creativity, and aliveness come from. (In Josh Nesbit’s San Francisco neighbourhood, a tool-sharing “coupon” can only be redeemed through him, so that a real introduction happens — see The Outer Sunset.)

Why it’s here

Section titled “Why it’s here”

Relational tech is, in a sense, the affirmative answer to why civic tech projects fail: instead of a polished platform parachuted in from outside, it’s small, local, co-owned technology that grows out of an existing community. It’s a digital expression of the commons and of mutual aid (see the Topanga and Outer Sunset Stories), and it raises its own question of scale — answered by locality-to-locality spreading.

Sources

Section titled “Sources”